I am in the process of making jam. Plum jam.
The thing is I have now sat here for over two hours and the large bucket of plums we picked from our neighbours tree is just not going down quickly enough. However, my fingers have slowly been coloured by the skins of said plums and are strong contenders for ‘best camouflage of the year’ award. They look like wrinkly plums. Moreover, the little blighters of stones are often so tricky to release from their fruity coats that I end up cutting around them. Someone needs to invent a plum de-stoner. They’d make a fortune.
‘It’s so 10 out of 10 annoying’, as one of the fabulous students on ‘Educating Yorkshire, One Year On’ said last night. That most definitely wins the my ‘favourite phrase of the year’ award.
All my moaning aside, I am actually a very big fan of home made jams and chutneys. Firstly, there is a self satisfaction in utilising the fruit growing around you. Secondly, there is nothing like the taste of home made jams and chutneys and thirdly, they make great gifts. Perfect.
Back to the reality of the day. Having now taken a short break from the de-stoning of plums, I really should get back on the case or I will lose all impetus and they will sit around in the pan, looking forlorn, unloved and very much like unmade jam.
And not even my most loved would appreciate a jar of ’emperor’s new clothes’ jam.